Another Christmas and with it Dilemmas for parents: How to be fair and equitable with the presents. There are parameters: Number of presents, Dollars spent, Make up presents for less attentive god parent and so on. What to do though if you found the perfect gift used and cheap? Do you still use the Dollar amount model or switch to a market value adjustment?
My dilemma is created not by greedy little Veruka types but by the child who is exquisitely happy, has everything, wants nothing and is loved by many. Our disabled son gets presents from his care givers and teachers, his sisters, his cat, some years even his doctor.
He makes no wish list and needs very little, just like none of us really NEED any more stuff. On the Dollar spent scale it is easy: Just buy the kid some tickets to concerts and you are done. Number of presents is much harder- Latex is usually labeled these days. No longer do I have to worry that the most innocent looking squeak toy is potentially life threatening to my child with severe Latex allergy.
Still there are few toys that he can actually make use of and too many that sit in his room, silent witness to his disability- "Can't Play this and Can't Do that" they chime on my worst of days.
Lastly there are the siblings who in a show of sweet righteousness demand that he too have stuff in his stockings and with a watchful eye scan the loot: There has to be enough, not too much to make him "over-special" but enough. The siblings are the real reason why I find myself in mall land purchasing toiletries and linens, books and CD's, room decor and occasionally the greatest toy ever made for a special needs kids. Past hits where the Einstein Series Videos, Music blocks, "Tickle me Elmo" and a Sky Chair.
Yet in years when nothing really special catches my eye I wander about and feel sad. I spend money against my better judgement for the mere sake of filling a few gift boxes. I try to make equal and right what never will be.
This christmas the pressure was off. A loving teacher had already beaten out all other presents a week early. BLUE MAN GROUP PERCUSSION, what an awesome, sensor activated, utterly responsive and satisfying musical toy! Special, very special. Thank You!
Siblings highly approved, cool enough for brother, cool enough to want a turn. And then there was christmas. A day with children so happy, so fun, so loving, presents mattered little, spirits soared. It was all good.
